Grey is Where it’s At…

Today has been lovely. First off, no I didn’t get onto the social work program. I was gutted initially but I’m just proud I managed to get through to the final round, a program which is very, very competitive. The email states I can request a call for feedback which I probably will do. In the past I would have avoided this, thinking “well, I didn’t get through anyway so what’s the point?” Black and white thinking. Whereas if I want to live more in the grey area, I would take this on.

Today has been lovely because I’ve met up with a best friend of 18 years, and met her husband too. It was my second unescorted leave (no staff/family present) for the whole 3 months or so I’ve been here – except this time, it went well. We met at the local restaurant for a drink. I would have been tempted to drink alcohol, but I knew if I did that would ruin my chances to go out tonight. I’m off to see the pantomime with my family (and little step-nephew, and step-niece) – if that’s even a thing.

Last unescorted leave, I cocked up. Went straight to the pub and drank as much as I could in that time. This was when I felt depressed about Christmas coming, so I tried to sneak in tablets on the ward too which I wasn’t successful at but it did lead to an incident. This is 11 days ago now though, so that’s behind me and I’ve learnt to accept Christmas and am now actually looking forward to it! To be around lots of my family and to have actually survived.

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